I feel like my life is just completely useless

Journal Entries

The question was from the studentroom by Lucas.hh I’m 21, male. Suffer with Anixety and as of recently OCD. Idk, I just feel like recently I’ve been so down. I feel like my life is just comeplelty useless. Everyone that comes in to it I do something to push them away. I’m scared to do simple things like phone a resteraunts to book a table or ask a waiter for a bill etc. I feel like im never good at anything I do. I tried golf and I couldn’t do it, football and im never good enough. Fishing which i also seem to mess up. Everything I do. I ruin my relationships. I had a perfect girlfriend about 5 years ago who I’ve never really gotten over. She’s met someone and has now had a child and loves with him. Like I have a current girlfriend now, but it’s just like I sit there and think how much of a different man I could have been if I diddnt **** things up with her. I don’t believe im a man at all, I believe im embarrassment, I cringe myself out and personal hi don’t deserve anyone. I can’t even do simple things like drive because even that my brain just seems to **** uo for me. I’m ashamed of myself. Im 21, and I like to pretend im this alpha male, but really im a ******* coward. And a wet wipe, and an embarrassment to myself in everything I do. Don’t really know how to pick myself back up to be honest. ———————————————————————

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