Sermon: The Virtuous Woman - Part 2 (Proverbs 31)

The Local Christendom Podcast with Aaron Ventura

The Virtuous Woman – Part 2
Sunday, October 20th, 2024
Christ Covenant Church – Centralia, WA

Proverbs 31:10-31

10Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies.

11The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, So that he shall have no need of spoil.

12She will do him good and not evil All the days of her life.

13She seeketh wool, and flax, And worketh willingly with her hands.

14She is like the merchants’ ships; She bringeth her food from afar.

15She riseth also while it is yet night, And giveth meat to her household, And a portion to her maidens.

16She considereth a field, and buyeth it: With the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

17She girdeth her loins with strength, And strengtheneth her arms.

18She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: Her candle goeth not out by night.

19She layeth her hands to the spindle, And her hands hold the distaff.

20She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; Yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

21She is not afraid of the snow for her household: For all her household are clothed with scarlet.

22She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; Her clothing is silk and purple.

23Her husband is known in the gates, When he sitteth among the elders of the land.

24She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; And delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

25Strength and honour are her clothing; And she shall rejoice in time to come.

26She openeth her mouth with wisdom; And in her tongue is the law of kindness.

27She looketh well to the ways of her household, And eateth not the bread of idleness.

28Her children arise up, and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praiseth her.

29Many daughters have done virtuously, But thou excellest them all.

30Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: But a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

31Give her of the fruit of her hands; And let her own works praise her in the gates.

Prayer

Father, we thank you for the many examples of godliness that you have given to us in the Scriptures. Make us to be faithful and virtuous in our own day, so that in glory we may join that heavenly cloud of witnesses the surrounds us even now. We ask for your Holy Spirit in Jesus’ name, Amen.

Introduction

This morning, we are in Part 2 of what was going to be a three-part series on The Proverbs 31 Woman, but because there is so much here to meditate on, I decided to go at a more leisurely pace, and thus it will take us four sermons to go through this passage.

Now before we continue our exposition of this text, I want to remind you of three important truths that we established last week, and which are essential to understanding this passage of Scripture.

• 1. The first truth is that Proverbs 31 is divinely inspired advice From a godly mother To her son King/Prince Lemuel.
  • And so we said last week that while many people think that Proverbs 31 was given primarily for the women in the church to study, it is actually the opposite. According to verse 1 these are, “The words of king Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother taught him.” And therefore, it is young unmarried men who are the original and target audience for this poem.
• 2. The second truth is that this portrait of the “The Virtuous Wife” in verses 10-31, answer back to Lemuel’s mother’s warning in verse 3 that says, “Give not thy strength unto women, Nor thy ways to that which destroyeth kings.”
  • We said that the Hebrew word for strength in verse 3 is hayil, and that that same Hebrew word appears again in verse 10 when it asks, “Who can find a virtuous woman?” that is, “Who can find a woman of hayil?”
  • So the advice of Lemuel’s mother is: Don’t give your masculine hayil/virtue/valour/strength/substance to women in the plural, but rather find one godly woman who has a feminine hayil of her own, and marry her.
  • We also noted that in the Hebrew Bible, Ruth is explicitly identified as a woman of hayil, and Boaz is explicitly identified as a mighty man of hayil.
  • So if you want to know what biblical virtue/valor/strength looks like in its masculine and feminine forms, study the book of the Ruth.
• 3. The third truth is that this portrait of the virtuous wife is a portrait of mature womanhood in full flower, and therefore a young prince Lemuel would have had to look for the seeds of these virtues as he sought out a potential wife.
  • So as we study this portrait, there are two things to keep in mind, 1) we should expect to fall short because this is a model of perfection, and 2) we should aspire to become this each according to our own unique and individual circumstances.
    • Recall that in verse 29 the husband says to his wife, “Many daughters have done virtuously, But thou excellest them all.”
    • In other words, of all the women who have the precious virtues enumerated here, this women and this portrait is the greatest, she is the exemplar and standard by which all others are judged.
  • So to repeat what I said last week, wisdom consists in being able to apply universal principles to ever-changing and unique circumstances. Wisdom comprehends the whole so that you can then rightly orders the parts.
    • And if you lack wisdom, you got to go back to the first chapter of Proverbs where it says, “the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge.” And as it says in James 1:5, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.”
  • So whatever you try to practically implement from these sermons, it will only be successful insofar as it proceeds from faith, hope, and love for God. Those three theological virtues are the root of all the other virtues we see her.
• With all that by way of review, let us now proceed to our text.

Outline of the Text

Recall, there are three basic sections to this poem:

• 1. Verses 10-12 describe the woman’s value.
• 2. Verses 13-27 describe the woman’s actions.
• 3. Verses 28-31 describe the woman’s praiseworthiness.
• Last week we covered verses 10-12 and beheld the woman’s value, so let us pick up in verse 13 as we consider the woman’s actions. We’ll only get through verse 23 this morning.

Verse 13

13She seeketh wool, and flax, And worketh willingly with her hands.

• Here we see the beginning of two themes that will be developed throughout this passage.
  • The first theme is that of making clothing and garments.
  • The second theme is that of skilled manual labor.
    • As we go through this passage notice how many times the woman’s hands or arms are explicitly mentioned ot implied.
    • And notice also how many times clothing and garments are mentioned as well.
• You can think of this poem as a kind of tutorial for how to arrive at the finished product of verse 31 which says, “Give her of the fruit of her hands; And let her own works praise her in the gates.”
  • If you have ever searched online for a recipe video, or a DIY on how to make something or remodel a room in your house, often the thumbnail (picture you click on) has a Before and After picture that shows you the humble beginnings (the mess you started with), and then the glorious, finished product.
    • And it is that glory at the end (the fruit, the prize) that God intended to inspire us so that we can plow with hope in the present.
    • Hope is what motivates joyful work in the now.
  • Later in this poem we are going to see the woman has “scarlet and silk and purple and fine linen to sell.” That is what she hopes for and intends to make, but how does she get there? How does that future hope bear on her present reality?
• It starts here in verse 13, she seeks wool and flax, the raw materials for making beautiful garments, and not only that, she also has a willingness to work and get her hands dirty.
• So the two qualities of the virtuous woman we see straight off are: 1) a willingness to seek out and search for what she needs in accord with her vision, and 2) a willingness to work with those materials once she has them.
  • Another way of translating verse 13 is, “she diligently selects wool and flax, and works with her glad palms.”
  • That Hebrew word for “willingly” carries this sense of joy and delight in one’s work.
    • And this is what God explicitly commands of all of us.
    • It says in Ecclesiastes 9:10, “Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might.”
    • And Colossians 3:23 says, “And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as unto the Lord.”
• So the virtuous woman has a mind to search out and select quality materials, wool and flax. And she does this because she has an actionable plan to turn those raw materials into something beautiful and useful. And that plan involves her own joyful hands getting to work.
  • So the virtuous woman is not just a Pinterest daydreamer. Yes, she looks for inspiration, but then she makes a plan, a budget, a to-do list for how to actually accomplish the goal she has in mind. Perhaps she consults her husband, she talks with her mother or mother-in-law, she gets advice from people more skilled and experienced in that trade than she is. She does her homework.
  • One of the many differences between men and women (and between some women and other women) is that we just notice and are attentive to different things. Many women are great with the details and the particulars, while being really bad at seeing the big picture. Sometimes it is the opposite. What kind of person are you?
  • A large part of wisdom is knowing your own strengths and weaknesses and blind spots, and then seeking out help where you have shortcomings. This is one of the many ways that a husband and wife can love and lean on one another, and also other people in the church. It is a mark of wisdom to humbly seek out advice from the wise, especially in places where we are ignorant and unsure.
    • I often recommend to young men considering a specific trade or career to go find a man excelling in that trade and ask to buy him lunch.And then go to that meeting with a list of questions prepared. And in that meeting ask him, What other questions should I be asking as I consider pursuing this vocation?”
    • A big part of wisdom is learning what questions to ask, and what questions are just bad questions or dead ends.
  • Proverbs 15:22 says, “Without counsel purposes are disappointed: But in the multitude of counsellers they are established.”
• So don’t get the wrong idea. The Proverbs 31 woman is not a solo act. A virtuous woman knows her own limits, her weaknesses, her strengths, her gifts, and then makes her plans accordingly.

Verse 14

14She is like the merchants’ ships; She bringeth her food from afar.

• Another quality of the virtuous woman is that she knows how to shop. She knows what to source locally (eggs, milk, fresh produce), but also what to get from far and distant lands.
  • When the Queen of Sheba visited King Solomon, it says in 2 Chronicles 10:9, “she gave the king an hundred and twenty talents of gold, and of spices great abundance, and precious stones: neither was there any such spice as the queen of Sheba gave king Solomon.”
  • Likewise in Genesis we see that in times of famine and hardship, it was necessary to go and get grain from Egypt.
  • And recall that Ruth, our historical exemplar of the virtuous woman, left Moab and returned to Bethlehem to glean during barley harvest.
• So the virtuous woman embraces the task of feeding her household. And she is not content to just feed them locally sourced food from her homestead, she is like the merchants’ ships and bringeth at least some of her food from afar.
  • I am all for “Farm to Table” eating, but the virtuous woman has no problem with sourcing ingredients from across the ocean.
• Adding to our two themes then, of clothing and manual labor, we now add a third theme of feeding her household. This theme is developed further in the next verses.

Verses 15-16

15She riseth also while it is yet night, And giveth meat to her household, And a portion to her maidens.
16She considereth a field, and buyeth it: With the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

• Notice the virtuous woman rises early, when it is still dark, to make breakfast for her household.
  • This might surprise us since she has maidservants who could do this, but instead, she is getting up to feed them.
  • This language of giving “a portion to her maidens,” also suggests that she assigns to them their tasks for the day. So she provides them with nourishment and food, and also apportions their duties in the household (laundry, dishes, yardwork, etc.).
  • So like our Lord Jesus, who came amongst us as one who serves (Luke 22:27), so also the virtuous woman is willing to serve even her handmaidens. Her servants are under her authority, but she models for them what diligent and joyful work looks like, and she delegates certain tasks to them. By exercising authority in this way, “the lesser is blessed by the greater” (Heb. 7:7).
• We see then in verse 16 that this emphasis on food and nourishment is part of her long-term vision for feeding her household. “She considers a field and buys it; from the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.”
  • Notice how ambitious this woman is. She wants to grow grapes, she wants to make wine, she wants to own her own vineyard. That is an expensive and laborious task that will take significant resources (both financial and human) to accomplish.
  • And, like her seeking of wool and flax, she is starting with the raw materials, an unplanted field.
  • It typically takes at least three years for a newly planted vine to bear fruit, and it takes even longer to produce from that fruit an excellent wine.
• So the virtuous woman is planning for the future needs of her household. She is not so utilitarian as to only feed her children porridge for breakfast, lunch, and dinner; she wants to give them something more glorious.
  • It says in Psalm 104:14-15, “God causes the grass to grow for the cattle, And vegetation for the service of man, That he may bring forth food from the earth, And wine that makes glad the heart of man, Oil to make his face shine, And bread which strengthens man’s heart.”
  • Paul says in 1 Timothy, that the living God “gives us richly all things to enjoy” (1 Tim. 6:17), and that “every creature of God is good, and nothing is to be refused if it is received with thanksgiving; for it is sanctified by the word of God and prayer” (1 Tim. 4:4-5).
• So the virtuous woman is simultaneously earthy and yet heavenly minded.She directs all her present and fleeting work on earth towards a kingdom end: glorifying God and blessing others with His good gifts.
• In this sense, she is returning to the task that God gave humanity in Eden, to cultivate, steward, and beautify this world. To be fruitful, multiply, and subdue the earth.
• So what field is God calling you to consider, to buy, and to cultivate for His glory?
  • If you are a young woman in school, that field is your own mind and heart, and all the skills and habits you are learning.
  • If you are a mother, that field might be your children (or planning for future children), it might be your kitchen, or some actual plot of ground you want to turn into a garden.
  • If you are an empty nester or a widow, your field might be teaching the next generation the many skills you have accrued over the years, and passing on that wisdom.
  • All of us have some “field” in which God calls us to labor right now, and then there is usually some other field, a future place or season that God is preparing for us to labor in the future. So consider what God has placed in your heart, the gifts, the resources, the opportunities, and then store up now so you can own that field one day.
    • To give you one such example, consider the joint effort of starting Christ the King Academy, and all the people who joined their time, and energy, and resources to plant a vineyard for the next generation, our children. That would not have been possible unless folks already had a surplus of fruit from their own lives to give and plant.
• So what field is God calling you to consider, to save for, to buy, and to cultivate for His glory?

Verse 17

17She girdeth her loins with strength, And strengtheneth her arms.

• Here again we have those twin themes of clothing and manual labor intertwined.
• What does it meant to “gird oneself with strength?”
  • It means to put on your uniform and prepare for battle. It means pour the coffee, do your stretches, sing some Psalms, and get the blood flowing, because it’s time to get to work.
  • That is the spirit of strength that this woman puts on: readiness of body and soul for action. And then what is the result of those actions? We read in verse 18.

Verse 18

18She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: Her candle goeth not out by night.

• So in the morning she rises early and puts on strength, and by the end of the day, she looks out at her work and perceives that it is good.
  • This of course is the pattern that God Himself sets for us in His work of creation. At the end of each day he looks out and surveys what He has made and judges that it is good.
• And like God who places the moon and stars in the night sky, so also the virtuous woman, from the goodness of her own work has sufficient oil so that her candle does not go out at night.
  • We read in Proverbs 13:9, “The light of the righteous rejoices, But the lamp of the wicked will be put out.”
  • Likewise in Proverbs 24:20, “For there shall be no reward to the evil man; The candle of the wicked shall be put out.”
  • Light is a sign of life, whereas darkness is a sign of judgment. From the woman’s good work and the right use of her strength, she has more than enough to let her light shine even while she sleeps.
• In verses 19-20 we see the woman back at work again the next day.

Verses 19-20

19She layeth her hands to the spindle, And her hands hold the distaff.
20She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; Yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

• Four times the woman’s hands are mentioned here, in verse 19 they are taking hold of spindle and distaff, two tools for spinning thread. And then in verse 20, those same hands are stretched out and opened to help the poor and needy.
  • As one commentator puts it, “The hands that grasp to produce, open wide to provide.”
• This is consistent with what the Apostle Paul says in 1 Thessalonians 4:11-12,“Aspire to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you, that you may walk properly toward those who are outside, and that you may lack nothing.
  • Likewise in Ephesians 4:28 he says, “Let him who stole steal no longer, but rather let him labor, working with his hands what is good, that he may have something to give him who has need.”
• So God’s Word extols the person who works skillfully and joyfully with their hands. Manual labor is good. Mental labor is good. And best is when both of those things come together.
• Remember that the first person in the Bible who is said to be “filled with the spirit of wisdom,” was not a theologian, or prophet, or pastor, it was Bezaleel, the son of Uri, the son of Hur, of the tribe of Judah. God says to Moses, “I have filled him with the spirit of God, in wisdom, and in understanding, and in knowledge, and in all manner of workmanship, To devise cunning works, to work in gold, and in silver, and in brass, And in cutting of stones, to set them, and in carving of timber, to work in all manner of workmanship” (Ex. 31:3).
  • And then a few chapters later when they start building the tabernacle, that same Holy Spirit animates many others, including the women. It says in Exodus 35:22-28, “And all the women that were wise hearted did spin with their hands, and brought that which they had spun, both of blue, and of purple, and of scarlet, and of fine linen. And all the women whose heart stirred them up in wisdom spun goats’ hair.”
• So the virtuous woman uses her God-given skills and wisdom to build up the house of God, and she does this especially by opening her glad palms to the poor and needy.
• In order to be generous to others we need to have surplus. And where does surplus come from? Diligent and skilled labor, done unto the Lord.
• Finally, in verses 21-23, we see two consequences of all this work, and this is where we’ll close.

Verses 21-23

21She is not afraid of the snow for her household: For all her household are clothed with scarlet.
22She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; Her clothing is silk and purple.
23Her husband is known in the gates, When he sitteth among the elders of the land.

• 1. The first happy consequence is that she has no fear of the future.
  • Because of her industry and planning, her household is well supplied for winter.
  • Moreover, their garments are not shabby or plain, but rather fit for royalty. To make scarlet wool and purple linen was an expensive process in the ancient world. And yet her hard work has made it possible to afford and make such garments “for all her household.” That includes the servants in addition to her children.
  • The woman is generous to all who come under her authority.
• 2. Second, because of the woman’s domestic competence, her husband can then serve as an elder in the gates.
  • According to 1 Timothy 3:5, “If a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?” This principle is true in both church and civil government: the state of a man’s marriage and household is a sign of whether he is competent to rule outside of his household.
  • This is where a wife can either make or break society. It says in Proverbs 14:1, “Every wise woman buildeth her house: But the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.”
    • This proverb is true of individual marriages and families, but it extendsto the broader community. Foolish women are a plague to society, while wise women are the glory of a nation.
  • We have this saying in the CREC, that a wife cannot qualify her husband for eldership, but she can disqualify him.
    • Put another way, having a godly wife cannot in itself make a man competent to rule in the church, but a foolish wife who tears down her own house will also tear down the church, and therefore a foolish wife will prevent a man from confidently leading in spheres outside his own home.
• So when a wife is trustworthy, and industrious, and unafraid of the future, her husband is then freed up to go out and execute justice in the world. When the home fires are hot and well-tended by the wife, and domestic worries are absent from the mind, the man can then give himself wholly to bringing the peace that he has in his home to a world that is at war and without peace. He can then take the love and justice and generosity he has experienced from his wife, and pass that on to others outside the home.

Conclusion

I have said this before, and I say it again: Our church is only as healthy as the households who compose it, and our households are only as healthy as our marriages (if you are married).

• The secret weapon of a godly society, a city set upon a hill, is men and women who cheerfully embrace their God-given roles and duties.
• Marriage is a great mystery that speaks of Christ and the church. And therefore, you must not lie about that mystery by how you live and treat your spouse.
• So heed the Lord Jesus who gave us this inspired and infallible portrait of virtue. And as Solomon says in Proverbs 7:4, “Say unto wisdom, Thou art my sister; And call understanding thy kinswoman: That they may keep thee from the strange woman, From the stranger which flattereth with her words.”
• In the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, Amen.