John Eldredge: A conversation with John Eldredge

Orlando Business Podcast with Eric English

John Eldredge: On the Stages of Manhood, the Dangers of Social Media, and Why You Should Get out in Nature

John Eldredge is a storyteller of his own and others’ journeys. His own path has gone from brokenness to becoming wholehearted. It’s the story of a kid who was into drugs, got kicked out of high school, encountered Jesus, and became a healing force in the lives of others.

As a counselor, he’s heard the stories of many who were seeking to restore that which was broken – hearts, lives, relationships. And through their many stories, he’s observed truths and gained insight about the human condition.

John has identified areas where the culture has failed in its preparation of boys for manhood. Gone are important rites of passages and the challenges, risks, and dangers of cultures past. Our digitized, sedentary, climate-controlled lives are leaving behind a culture bankrupt of true masculinity. Boys and men are living unfulfilled lives, and we, as a culture, need to make some structural changes.

John identifies six stages of a man’s life:

• Beloved son (boyhood) – A young boy needs to know that his father delights in him.
• Cowboy stage (begins at adolescence) – A time of adventure, hard work, and taking risks
• Warrior stage (around age 19, early 20s) – Young men need a mission, a cause, something worth fighting for. This stage is best entered before the Lover stage.
• Lover stage (20s to 30s) – The awakening of the heart. This could manifest as a love of poetry, nature, music…and eventually romance.
• King stage (40s to 60s) – At this stage, the character of the man and his wholeheartedness has been shaped enough to be entrusted with power, money, and influence. This is a beautiful, demanding stage that requires wisdom and selflessness.
• Sage stage (60ish and beyond) – The silver-haired sage steps aside to let younger men carry the load, but he’s sought after for his wisdom and counsel.

Also in today’s episode, John shares his opinion on the potentially devastating effects of social media. The amount of data coming at us is “assaultive on the human soul.” The research is conclusive: envy, depression, and anxiety increase proportionally to one’s intake and use of social media.

John also urges listeners to get out in nature, to “experience the world that your soul was made for.” Nature has a healing effect on both the body and the spirit.

In today’s episode, you’ll learn:
About John’s background
About the stages of manhood
Tips for how parents – especially fathers – should interact with their sons in the Beloved Son and Cowboy stages
About the work of Ransomed Heart
John’s advice for what to look for in a church
Why we should limit social media and spend more time outdoors

Connect with John:
Ransomed Heart Ministries
Ransomed Heart on Facebook

Mentioned in this episode:
Francis Schaeffer
C.S. Lewis
Nicholas Carr’s The Shallows: What the Internet is Doing to our Brains
Fathered by God by John Eldredge
Robert Bly
Richard Louv’s The Last Child in the Woods

Quotes
“The unique ability of Jesus Christ to heal humanity was a huge piece of what drew me there.”

“I knew that if I ever discovered what was true about life and what was true about the world, it wouldn’t just be true in one category, it would be true across the arts, the sciences, culture, nature…”

“Reality comes to us in the shape of narrative. It comes in the shape of story. This is enormously hopeful in helping you sort out the story that you’re living and the story of your life and what your contribution is.”

“Nature is the habitat for human souls.” “Experience the world that your soul was made for.”

Every man is fueled by the question, “Do I have what it takes?” The search for the answer to that question fuels what men do – or refuse to do – every day.