E27: How To Say No And Stop People Pleasing

Healing with Haelly

In this episode, we dive deep into the reasons why so many of us struggle to use our voice and set boundaries, often finding ourselves saying "yes" when we really want to say "no." We'll explore the psychological roots of people-pleasing, backed by research on how it affects our mental health and relationships. You’ll learn about the societal and cultural pressures—especially for women—that make assertiveness feel daunting, and the high costs of always putting others' needs before your own.
But it’s not all bad news—there’s power in learning to say no, and I’ll walk you through practical tips on how to reclaim your voice, one step at a time. You’ll discover how to set boundaries with confidence, stop feeling guilty about prioritizing your well-being, and watch your relationships thrive when you start showing up as your authentic self.
Ready to stop people-pleasing and start living on your own terms? Tune in for research, real-life examples, and empowering advice to help you break free from the cycle.
"I knew I should say something. Every instinct inside me was screaming to speak up. But when my neighbor approached my son and got too close for comfort, I reacted with body, but not my voice, I was on autopilot. I didn’t want to seem rude or overreact, but the longer I kept using my body over my voice, the more uncomfortable I felt. What would I do next? Would I finally use my voice to protect him? Tune in to hear how I navigated one of these awkward boundary-setting moments in my life..."
Costs of Not Using Your Voice:

• Emotional exhaustion, stress, and loss of self-respect.
• Long-term dissatisfaction in relationships.

Why We Struggle to Say No:

• Fear of rejection, conflict, and perceived judgment.
• Loss of personal identity due to always accommodating others.

Practical Tips for Using Your Voice:

• Reframe saying "no" as an act of self-care.
• Start small with manageable boundaries.
• Practice saying no to little things
• Use this list of ways to say no in different circumstances.
• A default answer for anything people request of you could be, " Hmm...let me think about that and get back to you."

Benefits of Saying No:

• Greater authenticity and freedom.
• Higher self-esteem and improved relationships.

If you’re curious about how life coaching can make a positive impact in your life, I’d love to offer you a free 30-minute consultation. This is a chance for us to connect, explore your goals, and see how we can work together to create meaningful change. Schedule your complimentary session here.