Off-Planet transmission 008: vacation_ophidianists_thiriokinesis

The Gonarch's Lair and Off-Planet podcasts

008: vacation_ophidianists_thiriokinesis It was both pleasing and concerning to discover that subject A has created a resort within the pod: pleasing as it will give the inhabitants somewhere to relax and reflect, concerning due to the resources exhausted during its manufacture, resulting in a negative impact on the craft’s stability. B appeared to be just as worried but was quickly distracted by the prospect of receiving some cheap booze, a traditional benefit of international travel back on their home world. This is not entirely dissimilar to our custom: any bodily excretions accumulated in flight suits during our sabbaticals are collected and gifted to those deemed worthy. I still have a quart of the fluid remaining from my last trip, I must remember to fetch it for these passengers to sample. They swiftly moved on to debate the controversial art of Snake Charming, an ancient illusionary act performed predominantly in the landmass they refer to as India. We learned of snakes from former pod custodians’ conversations, but they neglected to mention man sought to control them in such a sadistic fashion. Yet more evidence of humanity’s preference to dominate that which they were afraid of, rather than seeking to live harmoniously with it. The focus on animals continued in the second part of this session, as B presented an interesting hypothetical question: which of Earth’s vastly varied fauna would they each choose to act as their loyal defender, against attack by the rest of the planet’s creatures? They speak with a great sense of nostalgia for these beasts, perhaps we could use the DNA samples our team harvested from their world to resurrect the ones they chose, before unleashing them into the pod. I’m sure they would appreciate the opportunity for some untamed, organic interaction in such an intimate setting. Finally, I must request access to the original importation documents for our passengers to research two revelations: the suggestion by A that he has an affinity for seafaring, and B exhibiting signs of megalomania. Both are compelling traits that I’d hope would have been detailed upon receipt of the specimens, it would be unfortunate for a sample refund to be required at this crucial stage of the experiment. Signed, An Observer Intermission: Orbit by Martian Hertz