501: Messiness Is Not a Moral Failing | KC Davis

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Today we’re talking about an often overlooked source of suffering— housework. There are so many ways in which housework can be a bummer. Maybe we’re feeling guilty about the fact that our place is always a mess. Maybe we’re driving ourselves crazy with obsessive cleaning. Maybe we have relatives who are overly critical about the state of affairs in our home. Maybe gender politics with our spouses and partners is a source of strife.

Our guest today, KC Davis, helps deconstruct these often rigid and daunting cultural norms that surround the concept of domestic bliss. As a self-styled anti-perfectionist, Davis has garnered a huge audience on TikTok with more than 1 million followers. She has also written the book, How to Keep House While Drowning: A Gentle Approach to Cleaning and Organizing. On today’s show, she offers a ton of practical tips that are rooted in self compassion and the dogged determination not to use shame as a motivator when it comes to our domestic lives.

In this episode we talk about:

  • One of KC’s slogans,“You don’t exist to serve your space, your space exists to serve you”
  • The difference between what’s “normal” and what’s “functional”. For example, why that pile of laundry on the floor is just fine if it works for you
  • Why it’s important to think of house work as morally neutral. For example, why doing dishes has nothing to do with you being a good or bad person
  • Why she doesn’t believe laziness exists
  • The power of what she calls “category cleaning”
  • Breaking the clean/not clean binary
  • And achieving equitable division of labor around the house

Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/kc-davis-501

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